When was your exact moment..

I watched my son play in the warm summer rain this afternoon with absolute awe & delight. One of those times I wished I could capture it through photo just in case my early dementia became more concerning. As he splashed in a mud puddle without any hesitation, I wondered about those exact moments...

I wondered when that exact moment was when I decided to run inside instead of just allowing the gentle raindrops to run down my face ...or when that exact moment occurred when I turned away my sweet mother's embrace as she dropped me off at school.....or when I stopped looking for the honeysuckles at the beginning of every summer.....when was that day I started to care about what others thought of me instead of what was right and made me happy?

I couldn't exactly remember those exact moments but I smiled just the same, danced with him in the rain and remembered instead when these moments started to return again...Thank you my sweet child, may you always dance in the rain!

Cuts, bruises, scrapes and falls and more lessons...

I'm pretty much used to our sons scrapes, scratches, falls and bruises in his little one year existence. This one though was a double whammy involving my husband!

Its barely 9 am and G and I are doing our usual am routine of playing outside before it gets brutally hot out, when he trips forward over Thomas the train and cuts his lip on our front porch. What a bloody mess,but the lip is very vascular I reasoned..I am pretty calm and collected walking over to our first aid kit when, my husband wakes up hearing this screeching cry, one which he himself is all too familiar with from working in the ER. He immediately grabs G and wipes the now clots of blood from his face when he suddenly turns pale as a ghost and says the infamous words I've heard many times right before one goes down,"i'm gonna pass out". And that he did... I grabbed G and before I knew it or could even assist him in a more graceful fall, he face plants onto our hardwoods, reminiscent of G's fall just minutes prior. That minute or two he was out felt like an eternity as I tried to turn his limp body over as his neck and face turned a scary familiar shade of purplely/blue and took loud shallow breaths with a pulse down at 30..I called 911 a second before it was getting uncomfortably-uncomfortable after rubbing his sternum to revive him. When he came out of it he was confused but quickly remembered the series of events that led to his fall. Interestingly, he too sustained a lip laceration in the same place G did (daddy's though a bit larger)...It's nice to know,that although we live in a small town, our Sheriff quickly showed up at our doorstep to check things out.

After calming G and (myself too) from witnessing his daddy's fall combined with his own hurt lip, we all laid in bed together, hugging and kissing.

Although their cuts would quickly heal I wondered what my life would be without these two...Sometimes, someone else's cuts and bruises, scrapes and falls can teach you a lesson.
I love you my lacerated lip boys!

Happy Birthday My Sweet One Year Old!

In retrospect I should have titled this blog as: Mommy learns another lesson....

I have always thought of myself as a pretty laid-back persona, adaptable to change on a dime, cool under pressure (I ran codes in a crazy busy ER in Jersey for goodness sakes!) But, as I am learning, I may have a few more lessons to learn from my little man!

The realization that I was either a.) never laid back or b.)no longer laid-back occurred as I found myself crying on the phone with the petting zoo company I had hired for my sons birthday party imploring "you have to come" and that the "one year old's are expecting you, how could you do this to THEM!"

I hired this mobile petting zoo (of course from almost two-hours away because I do everything through websites) even though I am quite certain there were a gazillion local petting barn animals much closer since I live in the country, but I digress... So, due to our crazy weather this late spring, and coupled with the nearly 4 hour drive to and from the birthday party, the barn animals were at high risk of heat exhaustion...For all of those who don't know me, I love animals; BUT, they are BARN ANIMALS who live outdoors!! Right? I mean, would they be in an air-conditioned barn otherwise, I thought?

Much to my shagrin, there were no animals... and the petting zoo directors' words echoed in my mind (This might have been the turning point) "Ma'am, you are endangering the health of these animals." Ouch! I conceded and apologized for my temper tantrum...

Despite this, we rolled with the punches on that hot & humid 98 degree day. The sprinklers were pulled, waddling pools out and the one year olds never knew... and most importantly I remembered what it was all about!

Happy Birthday My Sweet One Year Old!

The perfect beach "vacation" fantasy

Ahh, Alas, our first summer vacation with our almost 1 year old! Visions of sugarplums and relaxation under the warm sun began to brew as the wretched winter started to melt away... Perhaps it was the sleep deprivation that led to daydreams of my sweet husband and I holding hands on our beach chairs (the ones with the cup holders for sipping coronas, with lime!) as our toes were tickled by the warm ocean waves. To the left, our precious child content with God's beauty as he is dazzled by the endless sandbox. To the right, our two dogs running to the ocean and return in a delightful chase together. The climax of my fantasy: reading a novel with the sound of the seagulls on the beach.

After planning this trip under these delusions, my excitement and motherly bliss was through the roof! Oh of course there would be some challenges to overcome I thought; I was not oblivious!
Yeah-RIGHT!
The following is unformatted...but is all I could remember of the first 2 days...

new puppy on vacation (forgot to mention this tidbit) = more surprise poop to clean up..long waits in restaurants with hungry child and parents = irritable child....new puppy barking all night while being crated....infestation of roaches in our rental, lovely...the promise of sleeping through the night: never happened, probably worse due to teething...Up at least 3 times our first night of "vacation" ... constant fighting between older dog (7) and new puppy( 5 weeks)...Fighting with my "sweet, darling husband" over who's turn it was to play in the sand or be on chase patrol...arriving at the beach after packing beach chairs, sand toys, complete diaper bag and diggin in the sun umbrella only to return back home after 15 minutes for an over-tired, over stimulated 10 month old.. this all happened our first night and first day..we had 6 more to go!

Although things did not go as envisioned, by day three I came to a realization(after a good talk with mom) that it was quite normal and I had to let go of my "Great Expectations". Family vacations were about spending time together and making memories. Allowing some routine like staying home for naps, planning on several 1 hour trips to the beach, a waddling pool and of course teamwork were all very important! By day 5, we were getting the hang of this and wishing we could start over...We managed to relax, not on the beach..but all 3 of us plus our 2 dogs took afternoon naps together:) Time to plan the next one...